B4 weigh in
I was online one day and saw this from one of the posters. I died laughing, so I just had to post it. You will trip out on how true some of this stuff is. ![]()
On your weigh-in date:
Before leaving home:
- Nurse the baby (I skip this one most of the time since I don’t have a baby)
- Remove nail polish.
- Clip fingernails and toenails (to the quick!)
- Pop all pimples
- Tweeze all unwanted hair from face
- Shave legs, underarms and every other part of body
- Loofah to remove dead skin
- Remove ribbon from hair
- Get a hair cut
- Blow nose
- Clean lint from belly button and jam from between toes
- Pee
- Poo
- Weigh clothing and dress accordingly
- Have appendix, tonsils and wisdom teeth removed, they are not needed and just take up weight
- DO NOT SWALLOW AGAIN UNTIL AFTER WEIGH-IN, carry a cup to spit in!
Upon arrival at Weight Watchers
- Pee
- Carefully examine body for anything which might be removed including warts and moles
- Remove hand lotion and makeup
- Remove contacts
- Remove unnecessary ‘hidden’ articles of clothing
- Blow nose again
- Pee again – at least try!
- Remove shoes, work ID badge, jewels, belt, socks, suspenders, etc.
- Empty all pockets.
- Can you pee again? If so, go
- Time it so that you weigh right after the person who has had an unearned gain; chances are that person got all the free-floating fat
- Slowly step on the scale
- Hold both arms straight and reach for the ceiling
- Pray
- Exhale completely; don’t forget there is air held in your lungs that usually doesn’t get expelled; find someone to hit you in the chest hard enough to ‘knock the air out’ of you
After weigh-in
- Catch your breath
- Blame the results on whoever you can
- Get dressed
- Retrieve dignity
- Sit down and stay for the meeting.
- Learn something new.